Tuesday, June 5, 2012

The 7th week

Okay folks, I have been trying to think of unique and creative ways to document this pregnancy and while I don't want to venture too far away from why I started the blog, I thought what better way to do so than on here.

I'm not ever going to stop thinking or writing about Brody. He is basically the reason why I live each day to the fullest. I want to make something pretty clear, getting pregnant again is and was never about replacing Brody, finishing something that I started, or even about "trying again". Being pregnant is about giving Brody a little brother or sister!

I know it's pretty difficult to understand if you haven't stood in my shoes, but its okay, that's why I am here. To help you all try to "get it", that is if you want to. I'm not naive, I know there are people out there who will never get it and don't want to even try to understand. I know there are people who doubt that my son ever existed, I know there are people who read my Facebook posts about him and scroll over them or even roll their eyes and block my posts. There are two things they don't understand. One, They never will completely "get it" unless it happens to them ( I pray it never does) and two, I don't care if they don't like it, I'm gonna keep posting about him.

Let me put it this way, if you are a parent, you know exactly how you would do anything for your children. There isn't a whole lot I can do for Brody except make him proud and keep his memory alive so that is precisely what I do.

Back to my main point.  I'm still going to be writing about Brody, probably more than what I think I'm going to but, I'm also going to try to post once a week about what is going on with little blueberry ( my nickname this week for baby, going with babycenter's genius fruit comparison for size).

So...week 7 has presented itself well...tons better than week 6. Week six was complete with nausea, a migraine that numbed the left side of my face, and lots and lots of fatigue.

Here is the scary part of being pregnant after a loss. When things aren't going well, you panic... When things are going well, you worry something is wrong. I can't believe I'm going to say this but...I think I'd rather be laying on my bathroom floor, curled around my toilet than worrying about why I am not getting sick. When your symptoms seem to disappear, you worry if your baby's heartbeat did as well.

White Chedder Popcorn seems to be giving me hope that everything is fine. This shall be called "craving of the week" section. I've never wanted something more in my life. Someone posted about it on Facebook last night and I haven't stopped thinking about it ever since. My mom, ever so generously brought me some today and I'm fairly certain may have to bring another bag tomorrow. :/ My keyboard may or may not be covered in white Cheddar at this very moment.

So this is my way of documenting baby Lukehart 2, something I regrettably didn't do enough of with B. I hope you enjoy!

1 comment:

  1. Oh my Goodness!!! : ) Congratulations Tia! : ) How absolutely wonderful...I will be praying and praying that this baby will be in your arms in 9 months with a strong loud heartbeat! What a miracle! :) So happy for you and yours...may God be near to your heart...